ÿþ----------------------------------------------------- BORN TO RELAX ----------------------------------------------------- BORN TO RELAX INTRO aka MAKE THEM DIE SLOWLIER PIG SCREAM HOLIDAY; TU SEI UN BASSO BEDPANZ You are a low pitale / U-R-L-O maiale / Yule sorrow Natale / U-R-L-O maiale I GETS MAD (CHAPTER HEADINGS I-VIII) 1. IN-TRO G. LET'S GO! 3. ENNUI 4. (TH') FUCKING SHOW 5. SCURRY UP 6. MOVE YOUR BUTT A. SALMOST OVER D. WTF PART CONSCIOUS #SO-23869403-J He's part conscious, he knows what's in store He knows just when we start the third World War He's waking up to his history - the birthday that will live in infamy The nightmare to end all nightmares Spooky action at a distance / Physics offers up no tangible resistance Atomic bomb, mind transfer / Someone in 1945 has been left with the answers THE NARCOPHAGUS Fill me, shake me, either way you want me Blue Mummy on a motherfuckin' mission / Gotta see what'll fit in the coffin The hinges of the tomb worn down from the years It's where I keep the candy; it's where I keep the candy. Where I keep the candy? Where I've always kept the candy! 101 DALMATIANS 1 CUP Trip on Nippon, dog - please never change [x3] Oddly specific / The stench is terrific The schoolgirl is young / tonguing young puppy bung 491 = D-IX Five parts mineral - meaning to rock / Three parts chemical - perverted shock Five parts vegetable - sugar on cock / Yummy en bloc, it goes GO GO GO GO DURR HURR D'ÊTRE BÉBÉ Le parfum des problèmes d'essuyage FINGER Drivebyfingerbigbang / It's an exchange of sentimental symbols I tell the mark of your beast to go fuck itself IN-A-PRO-PRIA-VIDA In-a-pro-pria-vida I am - inappropriate BUG PARTS Mysterious horror tubes in yeasty clothing / The color of death in a cross-section of suffering / Phallic filth in a child's hands / Cultivating a tolerance for mustard gas / Permissible bug parts / Permissible rat shit WHIP ME BEAT ME TAKE AWAY MY CHARGE CARD VOMAN ROMIT KKK2D2 LIKE A BABY'S DICK FUCKING AN APPLE OFF A PIG FOR THE SAKE OF MY SEX LIFE THE ARYAN CHRIST AS BIRTHDAY CLOWN POCKET-DIALING THE VICTIMS They heard me boast about last night's roast of actual baby back ribs CRAPPING A SLICED HOT DOG Shit out my mouth with the sun in my face; Indian-style on carpet arson-charred; Blasting mustard water in summer... a disgusting miracle of digestion in the summertime RECREATIONAL EPISIOTOMY Taint misbehavin', scissors or a razor a relaxing expedition into sickness, a few laughs Making one from two, it's just something to do: detaching the partition, make a (w)hole out of two halves So it is her objective to remove what's connective Self-mutilation Goddess be: Recreational Episiotomy Leisure endeavor, tissue to sever - it's usually entertaining; self-inflicted Making two to one, something just for fun, unusually agonizing, pain-addicted So it is her objective to remove what's connective One hole remains for sodomy / Recreational Episiotomy BALL LIGHTNING Tucker State Prison Farm telephone line / Magneto to the Speedo CHEAP SEX ON THE BARRELHEAD I m Hitler in the boobyhatch, a fleeting breed of locust Fucking on the barrelhead is only stealing focus: cheap sex on the barrelhead MALATHION SHILLELAGH DIRTY BRASS POCKET WATCH BARK AT THE TOILET, BARF AT THE MOON We were hanging out downtown in Rage-Town's living room He suddenly suggested, "Blackened Testicles In My Womb" I countered, "Burn a Fatty with a Noose Around Your Neck" Then "Bark at the Toilet and Barf at the Moon" was next Here's some further titles that I won't write lyrics to: "Cold Cum Balloons", "Skin Salad", and "I Totally Nailed This Jew" "When You Think of Muff, Think Diver", "Wild Vagina Rider", and "Tupac Died in the Valkenvania Mine Fire" DOCTOR CRANK NAMED HIS BOAT AFTER YOU Another hacky douche trying to hog the camera lens Barreling through and huffing that which was intended to cleanse Secure a cure from ROTC and rock, high cornering entrepreneur The crock and rot, the torr and cock are bordering on the obscure FRANKENSTEIN FOSTER CARE You raise a baby / You praise, perplex it / Then kill the bratty / Betray, inject it Kill it, kill it! Kill it with your DICK Winsome, the pieces / Sew back the parts Live with the stitches / In a pattern of h***ts / Then you KILL IT with your DICK NAD PUMP OFFLINE Nad-pump not found ZURN TITS TO THE MUD Tits to the mud, señor / tits to the MUUUUD X-WORDED N-RATE QUIM DINNER Quim dinner, Me getty so hungee baby / Getty so hun-gee, 'cuz... TRÉS DOABLÉ She's trés, trés do-ablé, do-ablé BR'ER STEREO My br'er stereo 129.5 dB OF STIRRING MAYONNAISE Picking your poison / It's thickened, it's roiling It's rollicking follicles - much too loud / Distracting your hackles - much too loud Pay, own, ace. / Con Mayola, no esta sola. MEMES FROM AN ITALIAN RESTAURANT Big deal, I saw the moon - I'm really just surprised; I wanna find out who the fuck would take a pizza pie and throw it straight in someone's eyes Yeah, I see the stars - so I will make a wish: To meet the foolish fool who uses foolish drool to sauce a foolish pasta dish Tutte le vostre base / Nemmeno Doom musica Il Mr.T Italian mangiato mi palle PAP REEK Down the hatch with a shit-covered cock / Down your chin, cold sweaty ball rot Greenish turd up inside urethra / Hairy cream tang, cumin and paprika Fuck you, alligator / Eat shit, crocodile / Shut the fuck up, alligator / Suck my cock, crocodile SIPPY Walk / Choppin' up a stick o' chalk / Sippy, chokin' down a cuckoo cock Sippy sup in Kona cup / I'm having trouble when I talk 't'oughtta be obvious shock / It's a California four o'clock Sippy sup / I'm having trouble with my breathing / Vapor lock EDGAR ALLAN WHOA The role of Poe has gone to Keanu THE $25,000 PYRRHIC VICTORY What's to be afraid of? / You grow your own protective headgear. Things That Someone Digging In Their Heels Might Say. I WANNA BE POISONED Initiate of the vomit league / The spine of a boxer and the carny's hammers Darkness is a wheel / Electrified fatigue, fatigue, fatigue JELLY TOURNIQUET It's illogical as hell / But predictable as fuck It's a well-lit shopping mall / It's a hop skip and a jump ICONIC JUDO AS SEX MoOn fly meGa snIff / manhooD-hatInG tWaTs / OMen loaf Gym snIff / leDgE oN into hoTs / rum FeeS idioTic / We In it, ToaD / eYe - I discusS it / CyAnide's very borEd / soleMnly flaKinG / TyPhoid TeEn nada / tiN hooF revoLTing / AGony season Jaw SEND MOAR THEM PILS PILS PILS PILS Smell the bile comin' up my throat / Smell the stale smoke on my coat Fragile and helpless as a kite / Gotta gotta get a Pharsley Premacy tonight "Bob" - SNED-MOAR-THEM pilspilspilspilspilspilspilspilspilspilspils I didn't overdose, I'm overdosing / O blessed oblong curse / Liver chalkboard The leak smells burnt and it wasn't even worth it I'D RATHER FINGERLICK THE COLONEL I'll tell you what I'd rather do (RAWR) - I'd rather fingerlick the Colonel Amok, he cried sick and, unlucky, died stricken. I'd rather fingerlick the Colonel CHICKEN CHICKEN CHICKEN CHICKEN / Fingerlick the Colonel THAT'S NOT REALLY A BLAST BEAT That's not really a blast beat / You're physically incapable of one You cannot be an artist in this genre if you can't keep up with a Gatling gun A computer - you fed it your drumming detritus You'll rely on edits due to tendonitis THAT'S NOT REALLY GRINDCORE I set out to write some lyrics with intent to sicken Violent gore and nothing more is what I should have written But the worst I wrote was "carbonated Ragu sauce" ...that's not really grindcore PAMPHLETRIES When are you cosmic cowboys gonna get it through your head? Smoking in a human face; are we really so dis-paired? When are you cosmic cowboys gonna get it through your head? Humble saucer of my race; you will never be prepared! SECRETION RAINBOW This is my housekeeper 'n' her name is Aroma - Spinnbarkeit, tú es loco loción Checking for some endometrial carcinoma - Spinnbarkeit, tú es loco loción My little baby sister pronounces the H Her feminist hero was Bessica Medlar Raiche So come on, come on, make secretion rainbows with me. EYEFUCKING YOUR CASKET TIE-DYED COFFIN Sagebrush and sweat and brightly colored foreign objects Extreme fundamentalists living in mold FULLY TURGID I drink in your embarrassment like S/M piss TAINT OF DELECTATION (UK SURF) She pushed me up against the wall / She found a treat behind my balls YEN ON FIRE IN A VIRGIN'S MOUTH SPENT FUCKBAGS NO HABLA QUEEF No habla queef / The pussy air is leaky / Cunny fart language me no speakee Words from lips without any teef / I don't understand / No habla queef T.D.I.T.V.M.F. Tupac died in the Valkenvania mine fire THE ELECTRONIC BABYSITTER (A) Taser An Infant (B) The Pedialectro-Disruptor (C) Neuromuscular Naptime (D) Infantiquassus - infant taser PAROXYSM OF BLOODLUST Been a month of Sundays since I HAD ONE. This is a particularly BAD ONE. Shower down upon whom it is DONE TO. Scimitar and hammer, rope and GUN TOO. RECREATIONAL EPISIOTOMY: MIAMI Stash away the 'band in a utility knife / Behold, a drilling company; the rig is his wife / RecEpis: Miami 4 LYFE / Everybody gather 'round an old magazine / Consortium is powered by the lickin'-it-clean / It's the Kickin'-It-Team on a rickety beam / RecEpisRecEpisRecEpisRecEpisRecEpisRecEpis / TOYS US? Hey man, what's the deal? / Tell the truth, baby - is love real? / TOYSUS CH/IST TOYSUS TOYSUS CH/IST TOYSUS CH/IST Daren't thar be fuck? Is it recognized? Shall we saddle up? Is it made of lies? Is it blood or luck filling up the shaft? Don't you just secrete to ease a couple laughs? Interactive drama queen cheapening / Retroactive reimagining Devastate the heavenly memory / Renovate the fate of our history BORN TO RELAX (PIG SCREAM REPRISE) FLYING BLACK WIDOW ENEMA FRUIT OF THE DOOMED Mike Bender's underwear on eBay Return to sender, service rendered, whattaya gonna say Pissing up a typhoon and working all day / Mike Bender s underwear on eBay CHANGING CHANNELS ON THE TV IN THE WAITING ROOM OF THE BONUS TRACKS DEPARTMENT ZOREVENDI DEVIGGNIHTON ----------------------------------------------------- ZENYATTÀ MONDIPSHIT EP ----------------------------------------------------- CODEX SEDENTARIUS MEET ME IN THE ASS SO I CAN FUCK YOU UP THE CHURCH 99¢ BOWEL PROBLEM We learn not. From our pain, a point of pride poised above abyss, we learn not. PUNCH A SKELETON IN THE PUSSY (DEMO VERSION) Punch a skeleton in the pussy / Molest and abuse the dead Blast a carcass in the teeth / Have the cadaver give head, boys Kick a stiff right in the boobs / Then take her cold remains to bed Get real naughty with a freshly-killed body / Have the cadaver give head THE ¿QUE? ¿QUE? ¿QUE? TOOK MY HEARING AWAY I sent away for a hearing aid / They said I was going to P.L.A.* / I told them, "Speak up!" *(Portlaois Lunatic Asylum) URETHRA FULL OF PUKE! Completely predictable ironic juxtaposition with the title goes HERE AMERIBOMBADA PART 6 tihskcideldoodakcoC ECNEREFERXARHTNANIKUFESIN PHENOMENAL ANIMAL Phenomenal animal everyone knows - rowdy, unruly and forced into clothes Righteous 'n' reckless 'n' random 'n' rude, totally awesome and tubular dude LI'L CHLAMYDIA VS. TYCOON EARWAX Fuuuuuuuuuck. (original lyrics deleted) FUCK A KNIFE Sit on a knife, baby, follow my tongue. First timer, cliff diver, sing-sang-sung. My daddy's wife's baby couldn't be wrong. Old-timer, pile driver, ding-dang-dong. GOD SHEDS My god is shedding / He sheds his grace It's all over the couch / It's all over the place THE BOG OF DIGM A gale force wind blew rotten eggs at the diamond guy with invisible legs BLOW ME WITH YOUR HAND She talk to me penis, said, "talk to the hand" FATAL ANAL She can shriek and / scream and screech / I'm an island / she's a beach FATAL She can seek and / try to hide / By hand, I can / fight inside ANAL CHITTERLING TREBUCHET Chitterling trebuchet / Chitlin-Pult, Chitlin-Pult SECULAR MANSLAUGHTER (I'D RATHER BE FISHING) There is no word sums up just how I feel, how irksome you are And you'll be wishin' that you hadn't put the fish on your car You won't be livin' anymore, 'cause we are driven... to kill And your car gets sunk in the tar pits / Those Jesus magnets: I just see targets I SQUEAL When I see another Jesus fish whale I SQUEAL Man the bumper harpoon, call me Ishmael Tires SQUEAL When I PIT maneuver you, you fishtail You SQUEAL as you watch your final prayer wish fail You SQUEAL 'n' get a high-speed haircut from the guide rail Your family SQUEALS as they scrape up what looks like a squished snail Your family SQUEALS when they see what's left dumped in a shit pail They APPEAL - I claim an accident, that's how I skip jail THEL'AN PERITHOP I pronounce it 'Fat Saavik' OH, EVERYONE DIED HOT CIRCLE OF GARBAGE